How about a funny "we hated that orificer anyway" story?
In Korea, there is a big problem with US units on field problems and exercises with "slicky boy." That's the slang for civilian thieves/scroungers that sneak into unit positions at night and steal stuff like rations, packs, toilet paper, fuel (perhaps not fuel anymore since we now use JP-8) -- pretty much anything not nailed down (with the exception they they know better than to even touch weapons or steal whole vehicles). Slicky boys are good at what they do -- in a T2K context, they'd be great recruits for intelligence gathering. They are also usually armed, generally with straight razors or kitchen knives.
We had this Major everyone hated. He was setting up his tent in the dark, and he kept trying to get help, but everyone was "too busy." A slicky boy came running through the camp, chased by a couple of the MPs. The Major tried to stop him, and got a slash (that merely sliced his LBE) in return. The Major then stepped back -- and fell on his own tent, snapping the center poles.
An hour later, as we were all quietly laughing at him in the DTAC, and he had located some more poles for his tent, he went to sleep. The next morning, he had human crap on his face. Sometimes, a Korean farmer will simply have to go, and squat right there. Sometime that night, the major rolled over, right into some Korean farmer's offerings. It had been frozen, but his body heat melted it in the night.
|