Hey man, don't punish yourself for caring about your job, there's too few people who care about teaching now so those of you who do are important.
As for the time you spent when you wanted to achieve something else, well at the least, you got something out of your system that needed to be said and when you do write the piece for
Roadrunners, it'll be appreciated all the more because we here know how much time and effort you put into it
