Stupid GI Tricks

[Webstral]

You guys are so tempting fate. Do you want another tirade from me about the evils of the commissioning system as it exists today?

Webstral

[Adm.Lee]

I have a similar "virtual" story. When I was in ROTC, one of my classmates was having a terrible time with learning map-grids. Our instructor pretty much had to repeat everything at least twice for him. A week or so later, that guy & I went to see "Platoon"* (that should give you an idea how long before GPS this was). During the scene in which the LT is fumbling with the map and radio under fire, I got to poke poor Steve in the ribs. A lot. He nearly punched me in the face!

* It might have been "Hamburger Hill?"

That was a sad, sad class, as far as the Army was concerned. There were only 4 in my class-- 2 of them didn't want to commit after 2 years, and the other 2 of us were medically disqualified.

[pmulcahy11b]

Originally Posted by Adm.Lee

That was a sad, sad class, as far as the Army was concerned. There were only 4 in my class-- 2 of them didn't want to commit after 2 years, and the other 2 of us were medically disqualified.

Did it happen to be 1986?

[Adm.Lee]

Originally Posted by pmulcahy11b

Did it happen to be 1986?

Shortly after-- I started at Allegheny in '86, so I think the map/movie episode was the following spring? IMDB says the movie was released in December of '86, so it was likely in early '87, then.

[pmulcahy11b]

Originally Posted by Adm.Lee

Shortly after-- I started at Allegheny in '86, so I think the map/movie episode was the following spring? IMDB says the movie was released in December of '86, so it was likely in early '87, then.

After four years of not losing any cadets before graduation, in 1986 we lost 8 cadets from a combination of medical, in one case age (she was 30), and one guy who had a pronounced Grenadan accent (though he was perfectly understandable). Apparently, big losses among cadet corps were endemic that year throughout the country. I could never convince Third Region that I did not have high blood pressure, despite two physicals and dozens of BP readings. ( I got a couple of high readings at Advanced Camp because I was doing it on a badly sprained ankle.) I enlisted as soon as I graduated from high school, but we had already taken our final exams in ROTC and were only three weeks away from graduation.

It's all good. I would have made a lousy officer -- I hate politics.

[Adm.Lee]

Originally Posted by pmulcahy11b

It's all good. I would have made a lousy officer -- I hate politics.

I'm told (by an enlisted friend or two) that I would have burned out from trying to do good. I suspect they didn't want to tell me that I'm too nice, and I would have been back-stabbed early and often.

[dragoon500ly]

Originally Posted by Webstral

You guys are so tempting fate. Do you want another tirade from me about the evils of the commissioning system as it exists today?

Webstral

There's nothing wrong with Second Lieutenants, you just feed them, groom them and walk them a couple of times a day and they make great pets!

And never, ever, ever feed them after midnight!

[dragoon500ly]

While serving with the old 2ACR in Germany, I got the chance to serve as a gunner on a IP M-1. This was the first gunnery exercise that we did after reequipping with the Abrams, and while we had all completed the conversion training, experience was sadly lacking.

While firing the Table VIII night gunnery, we had some problems with the weather, a typical Grafenwoher nighttime fog. But not to worry! We had the new thermal sights and the targets had just been refitted with hot air blowers, they should show up great!

Right!?!

When it came time for our turn on the stationary firing range, the fog was so heavy that you could not see the front of the turret from the hatches. And in the gunners seat...nothing could be seen. Finally, Range Control raised all the targets and turned the hot air blowers to maximum.

And nothing could be seen.

Finally, a dim blotch showed up on the thermal and with a great cry of glee, the tank commander yelled "FIRE!"

I pulled the triggers and watched the target explode into pieces. The only thing that I could think of was that I had hit the generator and had splattered burning fuel everywhere.

Needless to say, Range Control was screaming "Cease Fire" and that was the end of the gunnery program for the night.

The next morning, we found out what I had shot. I had nailed a boar, with a 105mm training HEAT round, 150 meters from the tank.

Yup! I had killed my pig, gutted and skinned it and cooked and served it all over the range!

And since boars are a protected species, I got to fill out about 25kg of forms for the German Forestry Service!

[Webstral]

Originally Posted by dragoon500ly

The next morning, we found out what I had shot. I had nailed a boar, with a 105mm training HEAT round, 150 meters from the tank.

Yup! I had killed my pig, gutted and skinned it and cooked and served it all over the range!

Nice shootin', Tex!


Webstral

[dragoon500ly]

Originally Posted by Webstral

Nice shootin', Tex!


Webstral

To the best of my knowledge, nobody has nailed a boar with a bigger gun!

[dragoon500ly]

For those of us who have been stationed at Fort Hood, I'm sure that you all remember how Manning Mountain sticks right out of the maneuver area. Highest elevation on post and, needless to say, a fairly unmistakeable landmark.

While test flying the latest AH-1S, a 6th Air Cavalry Combat Bridgade pilot flew right into the side of Manning Mountain. The crew were dinged up, but the bird was, errrr, toast.

The next day, while the accident inspection team was surving the wreck, another AH-1S, flown by the company commander, flew into Manning Mountain, less than 100 meters from the crash site!

The lesson learned form this, you should always maintain enough attitude when sight-seeing!

[Jason Weiser]

Ah,
Picture it. Fort Pickett, VA, 1995. (Yeah, a lot of my stories are either Ft. Pickett or Knox). We young impressionable ROTC cadets are out on a STRAC lane. Well, we're supposed to be reacting to a far ambush. Ok, fine, we know what to do and when to do it. Well, one thing we didn't consider? There'd been a drought that summer. Everything was as dry as the damned Sahara. Well, ok, we make contact with the OPFOR, and blanks are going off everywhere. Our squad leader asks the TAC for smoke, so he pops smoke...next thing we know, there's a good sized fire (bigger than a weenie roast, we're talking Battle of the Wilderness-light) coming right at the OPFOR. They come running out screaming "We surrender, do over, do over!" We spent a good twenty minutes putting out the fire and all agreeing (including Captain Sutton, the TAC) that NOBODY was going to mention it.

That same FTX, we have another STRAC lane, I'm a fireteam leader and our job is to recon a OFPOR position. So, we get fairly close to what I am sure are the OPFOR (I'd seen them putting on grey tunics with red "shoulderboards" in the parking lot). Somebody in my fireteam turns to me and says "Hey Weiser, you sure they're the enemy?"

My response? I turn to him with a look of surely your mother didn't raise you this dumb and said "Gee, I dunno, why don't you go up and ask them, and I'll wait here and see what happens."

[Targan]

Originally Posted by Webstral

You guys are so tempting fate. Do you want another tirade from me about the evils of the commissioning system as it exists today?

Webstral

That depends. Do you think Eddie is reading this thread?

[TiggerCCW UK]

Two quick ones from my own experience;

When I was a cadet with the 1st Ulster Marine Cadets we entered a team into the NISAM (Northern Ireland Skill at Arms Meet), which was a big competition involving representatives from from all units based in NI at the time. As the troubles were still in full swing then this gave a very broad range of units, as all services, plus the TA and cadets attended. One of the years we were there it was interesting to see the locally recruited TA field ambulance unit out shoot the paras :-)

The second one involves a pop at junior officers again (sorry to all the Lt's and 2 Lt's out there). A friend of mine who will remain nameless (as she is now a serving regular officer) had a few issues with radios on an excercise - the conversation went something like this;

'Bravo alpha, this is bravo charlie, are you receiving, over'

Pause for reply, when none is forthcoming,

'Bravo alpha, this is bravo charlie, are you receiving, over'

Pause again, then turns to senior officer.

'Sir they aren't responding'

Senior officer replies

'Maybe they don't have their radio on'

My friend then displayed some awesome initiative by transmitting

'Bravo alpha, this is bravo charlie, please turn your radio on'

[B.T.]

Great one, Tigger!