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  #31  
Old 12-07-2011, 12:28 PM
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I have a shotgun...

I was of course referring to those who live in urban areas yet insist on wearing cowboy boots.
You would be very unhappy in Texas...
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  #32  
Old 12-07-2011, 04:45 PM
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LOL...you have a shotgun...they have hundreds that will sit outside of your house, picketing it and beating drums at all hours...and and several hours of their singing of "Kumbayah" will induce you to surrender and plead for mercy!


Either that are you are going to need a lot of shotgun shells!
Hmmm, hundreds of people with placards and drums....
Seems to me to have a lot in comon with zombie apocalypse movies and should be approached in the same manner - with overwhelming firepower!
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  #33  
Old 12-07-2011, 10:52 PM
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Several more:

A number of communities (Dodge City, KS being one, but also Topeka, KS, and several in states like Alabama, South Carolina, and Oklahoma) require all vehicles that enter the town to stop at the edge of town and the driver must fire a shotgun into the air to warn the horses.

In Mississippi, cattle theft is still punishable by hanging.

In Newark, NJ, those who purchase Ice after 6 PM need a doctor's prescription.

Palm Springs, CA doesn't allow camels on Palm Canyon Dr. between the hours of 4 to 6 PM on weekdays.

California state law bans animals from mating within 1500 feet of a school, park, or place of worship.

In Texas, the Encyclopedia Britannica is banned: it once included a formula for making home-brewed beer.

In Fresno, CA (near my hometown), you cannot (a) annoy a lizard in a city park, or (b) skip rocks in a pond in a city park.

Skamania County, Washington has a ban on killing Bigfoot: $10,000 fine and/or 5 years in the County Jail is the penalty.
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  #34  
Old 12-07-2011, 11:13 PM
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Skamania County, Washington has a ban on killing Bigfoot: $10,000 fine and/or 5 years in the County Jail is the penalty.
He slipped and fell in the shower I swear!!!
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  #35  
Old 12-07-2011, 11:44 PM
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He slipped and fell in the shower I swear!!!
He accidentally fell out of the window twice after falling down the stairs, dropping a drawer of knives on himself, falling on broken bottles, and shooting himself five times! I swear its true!
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  #36  
Old 12-07-2011, 11:52 PM
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Several more:


In Newark, NJ, those who purchase Ice after 6 PM need a doctor's prescription.
I don't need ice -- I have Neurontin and Temazepam.



Quote:
In Texas, the Encyclopedia Britannica is banned: it once included a formula for making home-brewed beer.
I have that on my computer; I'll go turn myself in now.
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  #37  
Old 12-08-2011, 11:18 AM
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In Texas, the Encyclopedia Britannica is banned: it once included a formula for making home-brewed beer.
Hummmmmmm.. I know of at least a half dozen Texas libraries and myself that are in violation of THAT law.
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  #38  
Old 12-08-2011, 11:22 AM
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Originally Posted by Matt Wiser View Post
Several more:

A number of communities (Dodge City, KS being one, but also Topeka, KS, and several in states like Alabama, South Carolina, and Oklahoma) require all vehicles that enter the town to stop at the edge of town and the driver must fire a shotgun into the air to warn the horses.
I'll remember that the next time I roll through Topeka. "But officer it's the LAW, and I'm a law abiding citizen." Later in court, "Honest your honor, the law states.." Finally serving the time, "Well Bubba it was like this, I stopped like I was suppose to and discharged my shotgun into the air... no really that's the law, but the judge didn't see it that way..."
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  #39  
Old 12-08-2011, 11:27 AM
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Originally Posted by pmulcahy11b View Post
Originally Posted by Legbreaker
I have a shotgun...

I was of course referring to those who live in urban areas yet insist on wearing cowboy boots.


You would be very unhappy in Texas...
Yep.. and incidently I wear cowboy boots, and unfortunately now reside in what might be considered an urban setting.. but then I have worn boots since I was old enough TO wear boots.. my son asked how I dressed as a kid, I wave a hand over my body.. "just like this... it NEVER goes out of style, unless you are an Urban Cowboy with frilly shirt and rinestones." THAT is the best way to discern the cowboy from an URBAN cowboy.. the frills... and the hat is clean with no sweat stains, and the boots are polished with out any scuffs or worn heels.. and the jeans sure don't have the heel cuff frayed from normal wear.. yep there is a difference. FB a boot wearer over fifty years, even in the army that was my civilian attire.. boots and hat..

Last edited by Graebarde; 12-08-2011 at 11:28 AM. Reason: add last line
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  #40  
Old 12-08-2011, 11:30 AM
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As an add to the Texas boots.. you know when you have kicked the sht out of a Texan? All that's left is a pair of boots, belt buckle and a hat.
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  #41  
Old 12-08-2011, 08:17 PM
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As an add to the Texas boots.. you know when you have kicked the sht out of a Texan? All that's left is a pair of boots, belt buckle and a hat.
That sort of reminds me of a joke I heard recently:

Q: What does a lawyer wear to work?
A: A lawsuit.

My brother's a legal assistant -- I've got to tell him that one next time I see him...
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  #42  
Old 12-08-2011, 08:40 PM
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Here's a few more:

In Massachussetts, Quakers and Witches are banned (uh, wouldn't the 1st Amendment apply instead these days?). Also, no hunting on Sundays.

Also, in Boston, everyone who goes onto Boston Common must bring a shotgun in case of bears.

Kennesaw, GA requires every household to have a handgun and ammunition for it.

Montana bans any movie that depicts "acts of felonious crime."

Several towns in the U.S. ban bathing in the nude.

In Pennsylvania, every car on a country road at night must stop after each mile traveled, and send up a rocket to drive away livestock, wait 10 min., then continue.

San Francisco requires each elephant taken down Market St. be on a leash.

Several states ban anyone who has taken part in a duel from holding elected office.

Oregon and New Jersey ban self-service gas stations-all gas has to be pumped by a "qualified attendant."

Several towns in a number of states ban women from driving unless they're preceeded by a male waving a signal flag.

In North Dakota, you can still shoot an Indian who is on horseback-but you must be in a covered wagon.

Ohio makes it illegal to get a fish drunk.
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  #43  
Old 12-08-2011, 09:44 PM
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Yep.. and incidently I wear cowboy boots, and unfortunately now reside in what might be considered an urban setting.. but then I have worn boots since I was old enough TO wear boots.. my son asked how I dressed as a kid, I wave a hand over my body.. "just like this... it NEVER goes out of style, unless you are an Urban Cowboy with frilly shirt and rinestones." THAT is the best way to discern the cowboy from an URBAN cowboy.. the frills... and the hat is clean with no sweat stains, and the boots are polished with out any scuffs or worn heels.. and the jeans sure don't have the heel cuff frayed from normal wear.. yep there is a difference. FB a boot wearer over fifty years, even in the army that was my civilian attire.. boots and hat..
I wear boots every day as well, but not cowboy boots. Black combat boots (currently waterproof Magnum Interceptors, very comfy). Have done ever since the army. And I wear a hat for sun protection, usually a black baseball cap style hat, no badges, no silly logos. Good, practical wear. I have no problem with cowboy boots, assuming you're on a farm or on the range or maybe even in a rural town. Anyone wearing cowboy boots in a city over here however... well, it just looks hokey. I guess in cities in the US enough people do it that it just blends into the background. Over here it would really stand out, however. People would assume you're a country yokel, or a poser, or maybe a little bit "special needs".
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  #44  
Old 12-08-2011, 10:07 PM
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I wear boots every day as well, but not cowboy boots. Black combat boots (currently waterproof Magnum Interceptors, very comfy). Have done ever since the army. And I wear a hat for sun protection, usually a black baseball cap style hat, no badges, no silly logos. Good, practical wear. I have no problem with cowboy boots, assuming you're on a farm or on the range or maybe even in a rural town. Anyone wearing cowboy boots in a city over here however... well, it just looks hokey. I guess in cities in the US enough people do it that it just blends into the background. Over here it would really stand out, however. People would assume you're a country yokel, or a poser, or maybe a little bit "special needs".
Well, Hollywood has glamorized Texas and cowboys for years. Around here, it's just a look, like some people wear the thug look, or wear leather biker jackets even though they shudder at the thought of riding a motorcycle.

A few of my friends wear cowboy hats for general wear and sun & rain protection, they're better than a baseball cap. They keep the rain off the back of your neck. I wear a hardhat all day, so i don't have that option most of the time.

As far as boots go, I wear Wolverines as my work boots, lightweight hiking boots for play and my dress boots are cowboy boots :P Low walking heels vice riding heels, but still classified as cowboy boots.

Hell, i even had an uncle who's nickname was Boots, cause every time he went to Laredo he had a pair of handmade boots made for him.
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  #45  
Old 12-08-2011, 10:54 PM
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Skamania County, Washington has a ban on killing Bigfoot: $10,000 fine and/or 5 years in the County Jail is the penalty.
He'll never be found to get shot. He and the Loch Ness Monster are holed up in a polyandrous relationship with the one American woman who has a healthy libido.
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  #46  
Old 12-09-2011, 02:07 AM
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He'll never be found to get shot. He and the Loch Ness Monster are holed up in a polyandrous relationship with the one American woman who has a healthy libido.
Yeah, just go ahead and make me go to Dictionary.com...
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  #47  
Old 12-09-2011, 06:01 AM
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Yeah, just go ahead and make me go to Dictionary.com...
I used wikipediea.....
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  #48  
Old 12-09-2011, 12:59 PM
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He'll never be found to get shot. He and the Loch Ness Monster are holed up in a polyandrous relationship with the one American woman who has a healthy libido.
LOL!

You should try the lovely ladies of the Deep South!

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  #49  
Old 12-09-2011, 08:48 PM
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That law against killing Bigfoot was passed in '69, after a number of sightings in the county made the local and national news-and the usual monster hunters showed up-with everything from bows and arrows to BARs. The Sheriff was afraid someone would get shot-hence the ban.

Here's some more:

Fort Madison, IA: the fire department is legally required to practice for 15 min. before responding to a fire.

By Kansas law, restaurants in that state may not serve ice cream on cherry pie.

A dead juror may not serve on a jury in Oregon.

Boston bans anyone from taking a bath without a doctor's prescription. (showers are presumably OK)

In Topeka, KS (again) bathtubs are illegal.
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  #50  
Old 12-09-2011, 09:10 PM
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I've actually been considering getting a couple of pairs of jump boots again; they might be just as good and more comfortable than these damn ankle braces Dr Gallindro keeps giving me, working up as he goes...I know sooner or later the word "surgery" will come up...such a pain in the...ankle...
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  #51  
Old 12-09-2011, 10:19 PM
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Believe me, the surgery is a GOOD THING. Had one of mine reconstructed back around easter and although painful and 7 weeks in a cast wasn't fun, the benefits have been amazing.
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  #52  
Old 12-09-2011, 10:45 PM
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Believe me, the surgery is a GOOD THING. Had one of mine reconstructed back around easter and although painful and 7 weeks in a cast wasn't fun, the benefits have been amazing.
Oh I know; I had the same ankle cleaned up in 2002. It's amazing what crap Dr Casillas pulled out of there! An X-Ray of my right ankle looked like there was sand in the joint, and he also pulled multiple other large bone fragments, including a sliver nearly an inch long and about an eighth of an inch wide. The problem now is that I have three bone spurs in that ankle and they are impinging on nerves. But, as many of those on this board know, I take care of my elderly mother, she can't see well enough to drive, which means I have to be able to do the driving, and this is my right ankle. I can do housework on crutches, shop on crutches, and even clean up the backyard of my dogs' offerings on crutches or that giant boot they put your foot in after about a a week and a half, but I find that I can't really drive safely with my left foot. I can't reasonably expect my brother or his partner to drive us around; they live downtown and I'm on the outskirts, and they both work heavy hours. My sister is...well basically being a bitch and won't talk to either me or my mother, and we don't even know what the offense is. I guess eventually I'll have to bite the bullet and start teaching myself to drive with my left foot, then go get my ankle done.
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  #53  
Old 12-09-2011, 11:12 PM
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My cast left the toes exposed which left me just enough movement to drive. Only did short distances of a few miles but it was enough that I wasn't entirely dependent on others. I had planed to ride during that period but the bike was in the shop (had an automatic scooter with no foot controls), probably a good thing really as to come off while still in a cast could have been less than ideal.
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  #54  
Old 12-10-2011, 03:05 AM
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I had planed to ride during that period but the bike was in the shop (had an automatic scooter with no foot controls), probably a good thing really as to come off while still in a cast could have been less than ideal.
Oh, dude. You're breaking my heart. A SCOOTER? I'd rather lose a testicle than be seen riding a scooter. For real.
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Old 12-10-2011, 06:58 AM
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It is the size of a small car and probably more powerful.
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Old 12-10-2011, 09:37 AM
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I wear boots every day as well, but not cowboy boots. Black combat boots (currently waterproof Magnum Interceptors, very comfy). Have done ever since the army. And I wear a hat for sun protection, usually a black baseball cap style hat, no badges, no silly logos. Good, practical wear. I have no problem with cowboy boots, assuming you're on a farm or on the range or maybe even in a rural town. Anyone wearing cowboy boots in a city over here however... well, it just looks hokey. I guess in cities in the US enough people do it that it just blends into the background. Over here it would really stand out, however. People would assume you're a country yokel, or a poser, or maybe a little bit "special needs".
I agree: I have been wearing my old army tanker's boots ever since I got out. The things lasted almost 10 years of almost daily (With the exception of 15m in the sandbox) wear both active duty and civilian before a buckle broke two weeks ago and now I got to break in a new pair.

I've forgotten how much a pain in the rear it was that first week of wearing a new pair.
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Old 12-11-2011, 10:00 AM
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Nothing like a good pair of Cochrans....still have a couple of pairs from the old days that see service on the weekends or when I go camping or hunting or an office meeting, especially when Navy types are there!
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Old 12-11-2011, 03:09 PM
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with the one American woman who has a healthy libido.
I can guess why this would be a rarity in the Bay area.........
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  #59  
Old 12-12-2011, 05:59 PM
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probably a good thing really as to come off while still in a cast could have been less than ideal
My dad broke his leg falling off his bike when he was 16, then rode with the cast on, fell off again, and ended up needing a stainless steel screw to hold that knee together. The damage was bad enough he was exempt from National Service when he turned 18, and the inability to exercise properly probably brought on the angina he developed in his 50s.
On a positive note, two replacement knee joints (I saw the steel screw from his knee- it was about the size of a corkscrew) and a triple bypass (Glasgow- the only city in the world where a triple bypass counts as routine surgery) at age 60 gave him back a lot of what he lost- 15 years on he's stil going strong.
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Old 12-12-2011, 10:21 PM
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I've forgotten how much a pain in the rear it was that first week of wearing a new pair.
I guess I'm weird; I've never needed a break-in period for boots. I also know the trick of wearing knee-high stockings under my socks for long road marches, taught to me by SGM Mills -- no blisters that way. I was the only one in Basic who got no blisters on my feet. (Got a nasty one on my hand at the base of my right index finger from the Bayonet Assault Course, from my hand repeatedly slamming against the forward assist of my M16. CIF didn't have glove shells in my size, and I didn't get any until I was back at my Guard unit, so I did the course bare-handed. I still have the scar from that.)
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