Am I opening a can of worms here? I think I am...M113...

[raketenjagdpanzer]

Some Googling has shown me I should probably "hide" this: there's some guy whose rantings, to the best of my recollection, go back to my earliest days on the internet (1990!). The focus of those rantings is the name of the M113 (he insists that it is, in fact, named after a famous airborne general with a last name that begins with "G" - and ends with an "a" followed by a v, i and an n), but even moreso on his bizarre obsession with the thing's capabilities.

To wit, anything <#VEHICLE> can do, an M113 should be assigned to do because it can do it better and it is criminal to allocate anything but M113s to the job. Abrams? No no, a low pressure 120mm main gun on a faster, lighter M113 should have been used - after all the M113 can carry a 155mm gun with no problem! (because the SP part of the M109 shares some powertrain and drive mechanisms in common with the 113). Stryker AGS? That gun turret should be on the -113! M2 Bradley? Too expensive and fiddly! The TOW turret should be on the 113! ad nauseam.

It's to the point (and I should mention it's never happened to me...) that the dude gets all weird and internet stalky on people who disagree with him, or who point out things like the M113 hasn't had an amphibious variant in years and years (he loves pointing out that this track or that track can't go where the 113 can because the 113 is amphibious, but those crooks, liars and criminals in the Pentagon deliberately sabotaged the M113 by removing amphibious capabilities from it, you see), has never ever except unloaded and unfueled and by LAPES been "air droppable" or "air transportable", etc.

Anyone bump in to this dude?

Oh he also lies about his military service; depending on what mood you catch him in he's been an armored platoon commander, part of the Selection Committee for armor projects, a DAT who "saw the light" and learned to love the 113, etc. but in actuality he's a supply clerk or something.

It's borderline neurotic - no, it IS neurotic and quite a hoot to watch from a distance...

[Legbreaker]

Found his rants online as well in the past. The one "variant" he proposed which really sums him up is his "airborne" - add wings and let it glide into action from the back of a C130....

As crazy as he is, and to the infuriation of all who know better, his "G" name has gained a tiny bit of traction with naive civilians.

Here's one man who justifies immediate discharge from anything even resembling a military organisation (right down to and including boy scouts) and wrapping tightly in a strait jacket.

[HorseSoldier]

Never met Sparks, but know people who have interfaced with him directly (reference his airborne assault bicycle idea, rather than his "Gavin" idolatry). From what I've been told he's every bit loony in person as his various websites would suggest.

[natehale1971]

Actually... his idea of issuing montague collapsable mountain bicycles has a little bit of crediblity. it's lightweight and would allow troops a little more flexibility on moving around on a battlefield. Hell, in T2k i think all my characters have a mountain bike stashed somewhere that they can call back on if their vehicles get fragged. montague collapsable mountain bicycles actaually have 'side cars' and 'trailers' that are just as all terrain as the bike is. I had heard that there was feasablity studies for using them on a wide scale, but they're mostly used by REALLY light speciality units (special ops) on a case by case basis AS NEEDED. I don't know if that's true or not, but it kind of makes sense... special ops troops are known for a widely ecclectic array of weapons, equipment and vehicles that they choose from.

In fact my friend in the army had said that he was going to help me get a set of montague collapsable mountain bikes with the all terrain trailers and 'sidecars' for me, the so-called wife and the boys. But after emma abanonded me after the wreck, and the fact that i'm just phyiscally not able to ride a bike (right knee just doesn't bend enough)... he and I felt that it would just be a waste of money.

Hell, one of my favorite stores when i was in the navy made speciality webgear for the SEAL Teams and Marine Force Recon based out of the Norfolk, VA area. One of the SEALs i knew and hung out with bought me my first equipment vest (it was in exchange for some artwork i did for him and his family) that he had them make for me. And I swear i wore that thing at every convention because it had been made to carry my markers, colored pencils and a couple sketchbooks. and they made it with a smile saying that it wasn't the oddest request the special forces guys had ever asked them to make...

Though I also really do like the idea of the Ridgeway sled that light infantry could use to carry their gear and ammo. I've got friends who are still in the army to this day who loves the idea of the Ridgeway and the bicycles. Though he doesn't much like the Strykers, he has some major problems the M113 (namely the thin armor) and slowly started to accept the Stryker after experiencing how they held out against IEDs. But he said that he actually prefers the Coguar HE 6x6 mine ambush protected vehicle when it comes to wheeled armored vehicles.

I love the G-name for the M113, namely because it sounds better than just calling it a "tincan" or a "track"... but I have felt that way since i had first heard about the M113 APC from my dad and maternal uncle. They had a real love hate relationship with the M113. they liked it's versitality, but hated the fact that all it was, was a glorified "Battle Taxi" as they called it (and for YEARS i thought that was the M113's actual official nickname).

[Panther Al]

I always felt that the guy was a loonie - but thats just person point of view.


As to the naming of the 113, I always called the things half-tracks. Dunno why I do, just one of those things. Didn't take long though for the moniker to stick in my troop.

(Then agian, I always refered to the 60/240 as a thirty or thirty cal.)

[pmulcahy11b]

Originally Posted by Panther Al

I always felt that the guy was a loonie - but thats just person point of view.


As to the naming of the 113, I always called the things half-tracks. Dunno why I do, just one of those things. Didn't take long though for the moniker to stick in my troop.

(Then agian, I always refered to the 60/240 as a thirty or thirty cal.)

Don't worry, you're probably like me -- old as dirt. (And BTW, did you know that your avatar shows up in the box where you can pick an emoticon for your post? And Targan's avatar is still replacing my "edit" button. It's getting weird in here...)